Stress
Jess will post on here soon if I have to threaten her with an ice cream embargo. Until then, I am sharing more. Yay. More.
So, I can be a little ball of hatey stress. Okay, an overweight hairy ball of hatey stress. I inherited control freak tendencies from my mother. Thankfully, my dad doesn’t give two shits about anything. So, while I naturally tend towards freaking out and wanting to control everything I have years of learning from my dad that you shoud just let be what’s out of your control and roll with the punches. Today was an “oh my God, nothing is going to go right, we won’t be able to move and I’m going to be stuck in this fucking job forever and I’ll be stuck in Alaska for even longer” type of day. This lead, of course, to me being a ray of fucking sunshine at work.
I was IMing with a newer co-worker of mine. I’ll call her Joan because that’s her name. Joan and I sit across the hall. We’re diagonal from each other. Still we end up IMing a lot because we’re either a) actually working on something or b) wanting to look like we’re actually working on something. So, we’re IMing and she was in an oddly good mood and I mentioned I was feeling shitty, because, yes, I wanted permission to vent at someone. So, she let me vent and I told her Jess and I are moving to NYC.
I told Joan we were moving because I felt like I could trust her. First, Joan is not one of those people who will go and tell the boss “hey, dude is only here for a couple of months then, he’s booking.” She’s not the retarded version of a “team player.” Second, Joan just moved from the lower 48 up to Alaska. She left her job, sold her shit, and moved here. She didn’t know anyone here she just wanted to live here. So, I figured Joan’s going to know exactly what I’m going through. And I was totally right.
I relaxed after we talked. She basically reaffirmed a bunch of stuff I was thinking: sell everything, and don’t tell ANYONE at work until you’re practically on the plane. She had a bunch of good advice. It was a relief. I didn’t feel crazy.
I’m still stressed … but that was nice. A few of the knots in my back have loosened.
